Oh, Freedom

Denny Kinderman CPPS • December 13, 2021
“Happy Birthday Father Denny” asserts a greeting card, designed and handmade in prison, comparable to anything Hallmark could create. Handwritten inside: It’s been ten years or so since Shobha introduced us. I’m glad she did because a complete stranger turned into a complete honest friend whom I’m glad to know. I wish you B-day Blessings and many more for many years. Love, James E. Walker 
 
It was a typical August day, eleven years ago now, when I made my first trip to the prison in Pontiac, Illinois to meet James E. Walker. The hour and forty-five-minute drive south of Chicago found me praying that I would be able to connect with a 44-year-old man who at age 17 was convicted of murder and sentenced to life in prison without any chance of parole – sentenced to die in prison.  
 
Once in Pontiac, I found the gatehouse, the passageway for visitors to enter the prison. “You don’t have a lawyer’s license or number,” I was told.  
 
Let me explain. Attorney Shobha Mahedev, asked if I would be willing to join her team of lawyers at Northwestern Pritzker School of Law in Chicago. She was searching for a person who would visit a prisoner who had been sentenced as a juvenile to Life Without Parole (a JLWOP) to get his life story. After prayerful reflection (I always pray when I don’t know what I might be getting into asking “what would Gaspar do?”) I said “yes”! How do I explain all that at the gatehouse?  
 
Eventually cleared, I was patted down, told to take off my shoes and answer all the necessary or unnecessary questions. Later I found out that James had to go through a strip search to come visit me and also another strip search after the visit even though our visit was in a booth with a heavy glass window between us; so my pat-down was nothing!  
This goes on for 91 visits (would have been more if not for a Covid-19 hiatus for visits). The gatehouse folks have caught on that I am a rare bird and are more congenial, sometimes, they let me in without all the routines - not so with James! 
 
That first visit hooked me on James!. “I am James Walker,” he said. “And I want everyone to know that I am not the same person I was back then.” He was reading Robin Casarjian’s “Houses of Healing” and continues to read many, many self-help and spiritual books. With a glimmer in his eye, he recommends this or that book for the youth he has come to know that I am mentoring. James earned a GED, as well as awards and certificates for a variety of programs and workshops he attended and completed.  
 
The route from Chicago to Pontiac goes right past Joliet, his hometown. I’ve stopped in to visit with his parents, and Teddy their dog, any number of times. James always wants me to bring pictures of them. His father has arthritis, and his mother is legally blind. James always expresses his longing to be able to help take care of his parents. One time I brought them with me to visit James – a very special time for all of us.   
 
Though not a churchgoer, James shares scriptures and TV evangelist T.D. Jakes’ teachings lighting up the booth like there was no glass between us. I can’t figure out his religion other than Christian, however, it doesn’t stop us from praying together. 
 
The 2012 U.S. Supreme Court finding that a mandated sentencing of a juvenile to life without parole is “cruel and unusual punishment” meant that many JLWOP’s were now eligible for resentencing. But those protesting James’s appeal in 2014 didn’t care. The local Joliet news printed hateful comments from the victim’s family and friends. I was at the hearing when Will County Judge Robert Livas ruled that Walker will continue to serve a life without parole – resentenced to die in prison. 
 
When the Illinois Court of Appeals heard his case, I was there observing the three sitting judges and knew that James’ appeal was ill-fated. No one knows the rehabilitated James like I do, but no judge asked me. An appeal to the Illinois Supreme Court is on hold for legal reasons I don’t comprehend. The only option left now is to seek clemency from Illinois governor J.D. Pritzker.  
 
I was scheduled for my next visit with James Wednesday, October 27th at 10:00 a.m. when I receive a phone call Saturday morning the 23rd from his father, Charles. He tells me that the warden just called him telling him that at noon James had passed away in the prison hospital. Later that day I received an email from the prison stating: “Good morning! I’m writing to cancel Dennis Kinderman’s visit with James Walker for Mr. Walker passed away. Thank you.” 
 
The day after his passing, the family had plans in place for a 75th Birthday party for James’ Mother, Barneta, It turned out to be a blessing as the family came (looked like about 50 people) to surround her and her husband with love and laughter. James had always said that he so wanted to stay in touch with his siblings, but it was not a mutual longing. Growing up with five step sisters and four other siblings, he always felt unwanted and said he couldn’t remember ever being hugged.  
 
James was a 55-year-old man who had spent all but three years of his adult life in maximum security prisons. His final three years of incarceration were outside the wall in Pontiac’s medium security unit (MSU). There he was thrilled to have a toilet with a seat and a room with a door left open during the day, and visits could be in person not behind glass.  
 
But his final months were in the prison hospital where I visited him, not knowing it was our final visit. I’ve seen better hospitals in third world countries. I’ve seen homeless men on the streets who appeared healthier and more cared for than James.  
 
James Emmanuel Walker N42753 is a name I will never forget and the person who brought so much depth to my life through our many visits. What a hard life. What a sad life. He told of more than one time the “Orange Cush” (a team of men dressed in orange outfits) came through throwing everything in their cell on the floor. They took his typewriter. There were times when he didn’t get his meds; many times he was denied a doctor’s visit despite filling out the required request form. At his home-going I told how, “I saw expressions of tolerance as he shared what life was like lived incarcerated! Yet he was living his life fully, not letting his years be wasted, but years in which he was growing deeper into his relationship with God and closer to becoming the man God had designed him to be.” His was a spiritual journey lived in relationship with a God who was with him through it all. 
 
I felt so sure that his day of freedom was in the offing, that we would overcome each setback, that he would be with us at PBMR with the other returning citizens, that his life journey in prison was schooling him to be a mentor to our youth. I hadn’t expected that his freedom would only come beyond this life. Yet I’m thankful that God brought our lives together and I can say James Emmanuel Walker, “honest friend,” shout out “Oh freedom” at last! 
By Precious Blood Ministry of Reconciliation October 10, 2025
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Contact: Davon Clark, Communications Manager Precious Blood Ministry of Reconciliation dclark@pbmr.org At Precious Blood Ministry of Reconciliation (PBMR), we are rooted in the belief that every person is created in the image of God and deserving of dignity, safety, and belonging . In this moment of heightened fear and uncertainty following the deployment of federal agents and National Guard troops in our city, we reaffirm our steadfast commitment toward those values. Our dignity and sense of safety should never be determined by our legal status . We know from experience that true safety does not come from the sword, but from the relationship we forge with one another. Our communities long for peace, but a peace that is built through trust, opportunity, and a sense of belonging . The increased militarization in our neighborhoods risks deepening fear and trauma among families already struggling to heal from generations of violence, poverty, and marginalization. PBMR stands in solidarity with all who seek justice and peace through nonviolence, dialogue, and accompaniment . We will continue to open our doors to those in need and walk alongside our neighbors, especially those most marginalized. We call upon all leaders to remember the sacred dignity of every person, to act with compassion and restraint, and to prioritize approaches that restore rather than divide. Together, we can choose a path rooted not in fear, but in unity and the wellbeing of every person . ##
By Anna Nowalk October 10, 2025
I used to joke that when Sr. Donna retired, she’d have one final Mother’s Circle, in which she'd move from mother to mother, laying hands and pronouncing, “healed.” And it would be so. My time as a Precious Blood Volunteer at PBMR had ended before that bittersweet day came, so I guess I can only presume that that’s not what happened at that last gathering. But one of the things that PBMR taught me was that this vision of a quick fix does a disservice to the beauty and profundity of the healing journey. A conversation with Catherine, a mother in PBMR’s Family Forward program, played a key role in shaping that understanding. I interviewed Catherine as a part of producing the first season of PBMR’s podcast, Together We Heal , which gave me the opportunity to interview multiple mothers involved in Family Forward. We'd originally met at PBMR’s Spare Some Love Bowl-a-Thon. We were on the same team, but amid the strobe lights and ultraviolet glow of the alley, the conversation and clamor of the surrounding lanes, and the constant rotation of turns as we played, we hadn’t talked much. We met to record in PBMR’s music studio: a cozy space with blankets on the ceiling that help prevent echoes. I had DIY-ed a podcast set-up, placing two microphones on the small circular table that was in the room and placing foam panels between them for sound quality (and, if I’m being honest, aesthetics). When we sat down, I started recording, welcomed Catherine to the show, and asked how she became involved with Family Forward. This introductory question, meant to ease us into the conversation, plunged us into heavier topics when Catherine responded by explaining that her son had been shot (thankfully, he survived). That story, though, was paired with a recounting of the accompaniment she received from PBMR, and the themes of love and community continued throughout the interview. You can listen to our conversation here .
By David Kelly September 12, 2025
In the afternoon of August 27th, after a gunman opened fire on students and staff of Annunciation Catholic School, where 2 children were killed and 18 children and 3 adults (in their 80’s) were wounded, the principal of the school took the microphone. You could feel the impact of what had just happened in his words; his voice quivered with deep emotion as he spoke. He quoted an African proverb: “when you pray, move your feet.” I am guessing in his heart were the countless individuals and communities who reached out to express their prayers and thoughts. I am guessing, too, that he chose that quote to express his deep desire that, while prayers and good thoughts are important, action is needed. The gun debate comes up each time there is a tragedy such as the Annunciation school shooting. There are those who want to limit gun purchases with background checks and limiting access to assault weapons and the like. Others don’t feel guns are the issue at all. In fact, there are calls for more guns: arming teachers, armed security guards in schools, etc. And while this debate continues, children ready themselves with shooter drills, and administrators fortify the school. I am sure many parents have hard conversations with their children. Amid it all, little is done. In the time since starting this reflection two more shootings have taken place at schools in Colorado and Utah. There will be another shooting, and the debate will ignite once again. Recently, I attended a trial of two young brothers accused of killing a mother of two small children. The trial lasted four days and the family of the young woman killed heard the detailed description of the killing. The pain of losing their daughter, sister and mother was engraved on their faces. The young men sat quietly as they were portrayed as heartless killers. In his book Cherished Belonging , Fr. Greg Boyle SJ writes, “surely we can hold something as horrible and not make monsters out of anyone.” He goes on to say that we do not make progress when we demonize. As I sat in that courtroom, the pain of what happened filled the room. The tear-soaked faces of both the families were visible. Both families suffered. The devastation was palpable. The young men received their sentences: 34 years for the young brother who was not convicted of the shooting and 60 years for the older brother. The courtroom emptied in silence. Both families left to deal on their own with the devastation of losing their loved ones. Precious Blood spirituality calls us to stand amid such pain, tension and conflict and not give in to hurling stones at one another. The power of the spirituality of the Precious Blood is that we can hold that pain without inflicting more pain. When we are willing to hold the pain or the conflict and treat one another with respect – even while we strongly disagree – there is a possibility of positive action. Answers may not come easily, but a pathway forward becomes more visible. It may take longer than we are comfortable with, but if we tend to the relationships and not just hold on to our side of the issue, ways forward become possible. Nathaniel Samuel reminds us in his book, “When Stories Wound,” that we have always had strong disagreements. There has always been polarization in society, but what has changed is the narratives we create around the ones we disagree with. Today, more than ever it seems, we dehumanize the other side, thus making it easier to do them harm. Stereotypes deny the complex story that each one of us carries. Samuel reminds us that deep narratives make their appeal not just to our minds, but more importantly to our emotions. He says that strong feelings like anger, suspicion, denial and hate emerge. Precious Blood spirituality is a spirituality of interconnectedness. When one suffers, we all suffer. It calls us to seek first understanding and relationship and then, and only then, break open the pathway forward. Fr. David Kelly, C.PP.S. Executive Director, Precious Blood Ministry of Reconciliation
May 6, 2025
by Fr. Denny Kinderman, C.PP.S.
May 6, 2025
by Sr. Donna Liette, C.PP.S.
April 21, 2025
Along with many others around the world, PBMR is saddened by the death of Pope Francis. His example and unwavering love and support of the poor and marginalized of the world will remain with all of us as an example of faithful living. Especially close to his heart were incarcerated men, women and children. While we will miss his tireless advocacy of the marginalized, his example should be a call to all of us to stand for those who are most vulnerable.
By David Kelly January 25, 2025
Recognizing the inherent dignity of each person, The Precious Blood Ministry of Reconciliation (PBMR) stands with all people advocating for the rights of immigrants and asylum seekers. We believe in the humanity and goodness of all people and continue to work to build a greater understanding and stronger relationships between people and the community. I recall the words of Cardinal Blasé Cupich who reminds us that many of, if not most of, the residents of Chicago were once immigrants. He writes, “We are proud of our legacy of immigration that continues in our day to renew the city we love. This is a moment to be honest about who we are. There is not a person in Chicago, save the Indigenous people, who has not benefited from this legacy.” We call on all those in positions of power and all of us to act with compassion and recognize humanity in each other. We ask policy makers and government officials to remember their call to protect the most vulnerable in our community including immigrants and their families. We pray for all those who are scared, lonely, and afraid that they find comfort and hope. Together let us work toward a more beloved community. Together let us take a step closer to the Kingdom of God, where all are welcome. Fr. David Kelly, C.PP.S. Executive Director Further Reading: Resources for Migrant Families in Chicago Statements from Cardinal Blasé Cupich, Archdiocese of Chicago Statement of Solidarity from United States Conference of Catholic Bishops
By David Kelly January 20, 2025
Surely, we can all agree that we live in a divided nation and, unfortunately, an often times divided Church. No matter what side of the fence you are on, you can feel the stress and strain of a world at odds – divided. Truthfully, I have stopped watching much national news because there seems to be a market for bickering and name calling. We have always had diƯering opinions and beliefs, but it seems the language, which so often leads to action, has become more violent. I write these words on the day in which we celebrate the legacy and teachings of Martin Luther King Jr. King didn’t just teach a strategy of peacemaking and nonviolence, his life demonstrated the power of, and a commitment to, the principle of nonviolence – a spirituality of peacemaking . His life reflected the African principle of “ubuntu” – I am what I am because of who we all are.” I am reading Fr. Greg Boyle’s new book, Cherished Belonging, the Healing Power of Love in Divided Times. In it he says that there are two principles that undergird his work: 1) Everybody is unshakably good (no exceptions) and 2) We belong to each other (no exceptions.) He says that these two principles help us to roll up our sleeves and get things done. I have had the privilege of working in both the Cook County Juvenile Detention Center and jail here in Chicago for well over 40 years. In that time, I have sat with many individuals who have committed horrible acts of violence. I have also regularly sat with families and persons who have experienced great harm, horrible acts of violence against them. Many never recover from the trauma. When I go to court, I have a front row seat of a system that embraces an adversarial stance and sees the world as black and white: good - bad, right - wrong, winner - looser. And when all is said and done and the courts have had their say, those impacted are left find their own way through the pain and trauma . You can see it as they leave the courtroom. I have also had the privilege of being in spaces where those harmed sit with those who did the harm – from simple property cases to homicide. I have seen what can happen when there is an emphasis on relationship and wholeness verses punishment and isolation. When we see one another as God sees us – son/daughter, sister/brother, we begin to make our way toward healing and understanding. Fr. Greg Boyle says, “Surely we can’t we hold something as horrible and still not make monsters out of anyone.” “Demonizing”, he says, “keeps us from solutions”.iii It seems that during these times, both in our nation and in our world, we need to reflect upon the notion that we belong to one another. That a harm to one is a harm to all of us. We need to stop demonizing one another and come up with solutions. Last night I was in the Juvenile Detention Center and, as I often do, asked a young man what community he came from? He hesitated, so I asked again thinking he didn’t hear me. Again, he hesitated and then shared with me that he was homeless and so bounced from one place to another, house to house whoever would allow him to sleep on a couch or on the floor – until, of course, they grew tired of him. The answer to my question was that he came from no community. This is what happens when we are so busy placing blame and demonizing one another. This can only happen when fail to each person as unshakably good; it can only happen when we fail to believe that we belong to one another. We enter the Jubilee Year of “Pilgrims of Hope”. As a people, as community, as a congregation, let it be more than a slogan. Let it be our commitment. No exceptions.
December 24, 2024
New Beginnings: Eric's Story
November 26, 2024
"Our Precious Blood spirituality call and challenges us to be instruments of healing in our fractured world."
Show More